


It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah

by Cjcregg



Category: Hockey RPF
Genre: F/M, M/M, Mentions of girlfriends, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-03-24
Updated: 2014-03-24
Packaged: 2018-01-16 20:06:44
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1360111
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cjcregg/pseuds/Cjcregg
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's been almost a year, and Kaner's eyes still lit up when she walked in the room.</p>
            </blockquote>





	It's a cold and it's a broken hallelujah

Jonny knew when he was thirteen that he liked Patrick Kane. From the minute he walked into the Junior Flyers locker room, flip flops and messy curls, he couldn't stop looking. All obnoxious personality, great hands, and a smile too big for his face. He was like the sun, and Jonny couldn't help but be drawn in. 

Even now, twelve years later, he couldn't stop looking, even though he tried. Lindsay was good about it, even though she never said anything. Their relationship was easy. Fun, even. They went to sports games and she would hang out with the wives and girlfriends, and never mention how Jonny's eyes would linger on Patrick. 

But Patrick. He had Amanda. From the moment he met her he seemed different. He would glow when he talked about her. Jonny wanted so badly to hate her, but when she went out with them after their game against the Wild, she was sweet and had a good sense of humor and talked to Jonny even when he stood politely in the corner of a conversation, trying to find a flaw that would lead to the eventual breakup. It wasn't like Kaner's girlfriends lasted more than a couple months. 

But now it's been almost a year and Kaner's eyes still lit up when she walked in the room. 

Fuck. Jonny was going to get over this. He may have liked Patrick when they were thirteen, but he loves him now. He loves his laugh and his hockey and his stupid hair and his douchey shoes and pretty much everything else. And Jonny has never known what it's like to love someone with your whole heart and have them love you just as much in return, but now he's ready for it. Some days, he thought he might have it. Some days, Patrick's eyes seemed to linger, too. His touches left chills on Jonny's skin, and his smiles were almost blinding. 

But he's starting to realize he won't have that. It was stupid anyway. Fate doesn't exist. Meeting when you're younger and then playing on the same NHL team doesn't mean anything. Nothing was ever meant to happen. But fuck, Patrick was it. Patrick was the one. And Jonny would give him everything if he ever even asked. 

But now he can't. He has so much to give, and no one to give it to. Kaner has someone to come home to. Someone to cheer him up after a loss and keep his feet on the ground. Someone who gets to hold all his love and give their own back. 

And Jonny is left with nothing except a secret he never let slip past his lips, and a weight the size of an unrequited love on his chest.

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first fic I've written because I love this pairing immensely and emcompassingly, and I have a lot of emotions about being closeted and unrequited feelings.


End file.
